I'm no slouch myself

Judge Smails: Ty, what did you shoot today?

Ty Webb: Oh, Judge, I don't keep score.

Judge Smails: Then how do you measure yourself with other golfers?

Ty Webb: By height.

I've never bought a golf ball in my life.

Oh, I play. I'm what you might call a social golfer—mostly wedding parties and client outings and vendor spiffs. When I was younger I played reguarly. I suppose my friend Bob staked me with a few balls my first time out, and like Warrent Buffet's first dividend check I've parlayed it into a 1,000% return. Over time it's become a point of pride, a conversation topic on the course.

One time, I played with the same ball for a year and half. Back then I could hit straight. Now, I just count on finding more balls than I lose. For example, here's the scorecard from my most recent round, at InverWood:

	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	Total
Lost	-	2	4	-	-	-	1	-	-	7
Found	-	5	-	-	-	1	5	-	-	11

	10	11	12	13	14	15	16	17	18	Total
Lost	1	3	1	3	3	-	-	1	1	13
Found	1	3	2	3	8	2	-	1	2	22

Lost: 20

Found: 33

Total: +13

You might infer from those numbers a generous approach to mulligans. You would be correct, at least regarding tee shots. But for the most part I take the drop and add the stroke. And if I take a somewhat roundabout route to the drop zone, who's to say I won't turn a quadruple bogey into a Titleist HP Tour windfall?

Another thing I've never done: Skip hoops at St. John's to play golf (cough) Ian (cough). Happily, we retake the hardwood tomorrow at 8:00 a.m. Please let me know if you will or will not be playing.