Casa del Dolor

Sure, I've been to California. It's everything they say it is, and worse. Populated by beautiful people in fast, rust-free cars, but hot, crowded, and expensive. (A gallon of milk costs TWENTY DOLLARS!)

Let's take a look at one of the major components of the California Misery Index, home prices.

• In California, the median home price is $464,000, vs. $382,000 just a year ago. One of the hottest markets is San Diego. Since 2000, home prices there have risen 76%. The median home price in San Diego county: $582,000. In Orange County, a house selling for $800,000 two years ago now fetches $1.2 million. Ow-ee.


• One of the key indicators of out-of-control housing costs is the ratio of house prices to rents. Since 1995 that ratio has jumped from 13 to 18 in San Francisco, and from 13 to 22 in San Diego.


• Another key yardstick: home prices vs. personal income. From 1975 to 2000, home prices hovered between 2.7 and 2.9 times income -- pretty stable. Today that ratio nationwide stands at 3.4. In California the ratio is 6.4.


• Thanks to the gulf between home prices and personal income, even folks making big coin are having trouble affording a decent house. To qualify for a mortgage to purchase that nearly half-million-dollar median-priced house, Mr. and Mrs. California would have to earn a combined $112,000 a year. Twelve months ago that number was $85,000. Today not even one in five California households can afford to buy a median-priced house in their own state.

What's the point, and why should readers of this weekly missive care? I just like collecting data that validates my own dim view of the Golden Brown State (much the same way I enjoy jokes about French military prowess for their own sake). I suppose this e-mail is for those Left Coast correspondents -- you know who you are -- who really should take a closer look at relocating to the Land of 10,000 Lakes. By the way, it's actually closer to 14,000. And did you know that Los Angeles county, home of the, uh, Lakers, hasn't a single lake?

And there: I've accomplished my meaningless-ramble-to-hoops segue. Cost to play hoops at St. John's each week: $0. Amount that price has risen since 1994: 0%. Please let me know if you will or will not be playing this Wednesday. We tip off at 6:30 p.m., as usual.