You know how to whistle, don't you, Steve?
When I picked up a bottle of Nyquill for the Missus the other night I also grabbed her a copy of People magazine. (She reads it for the articles. And in her defense, she also reads Smithsonian and Fortune. Everyone gets dessert after their veggies.). I noticed it was the annual 50 Most Sexy Beautiful People issue. That inspired me. I have a blog. It follows that people everywhere want to know what I think about this subject.Herewith, then, the SJH blog's list of the 10 Sexiest Women Not My Wife. As with all such lists, this is comprehensive, definitive, and authoritative. You know, until it gets updated, possibly several more times today.
- Lauren Bacall. An unprecedented 64 straight years atop the list.
- Kate Beckinsale
- Amanda Plummer
- Jo from Facts of Life. 1982 Jo, not present-day Jo. I don't know anything about her.
- Cathy Wurzer
- This one brunette on CNBC. I think she's on "Morning Joe," but I'm not sure. Not the dirty blonde, the one with real dark hair. Actually, she might be on MSNBC. Is that channel still around?
- Ann Curry
- Elle MacPherson. Lifetime achievement, really. Can't ever see her dropping off this list.
- Betty and Veronica (tie)
- The Saturday girl at the bank
posted by SPY at 12:10 PM
7 Comments:
No Kat Witt?!?! She will be very disappointed when I tell her.
1:08 PM
1. Reese Witherspoon
2. Tea Leoni
3. Val Bertinelli
4. Jaclyn Smith
5. Mary Ann
6. Ally Sheedy (from Wargames, not Breakfast Club - not even the END of Breakfast Club)
7. Belinda Carlisle
8. Rachel Bilson
9. Natalie Wood
10. The girl at the Dunkin...
3:44 PM
I'm a girl, but I think I can contribute, too, even though I don't have a wife.
1. Miranda Kerr
2. Charlize Theron
3. Tyra Banks
4. Angelina Jolie
5. Natasha Galkina
6. Rachel Bilson
7. Mischa Barton
8. A girl who used to work at Swirls & Scoops
9. Kim Kardashian
10. Natalie Portman
7:29 PM
1. Christina Ricci
2. Kate Beckinsdale
3. Michelle Pfeiffer
4. Elaine on Seinfeld, w/ curly hair and glasses
5. Cathy Wurzer
6. Meg Ryan
7. Tanith Belbin, 2006 Olympic silver medalist in ice dancing (How the ice stayed frozen during her performance is a mystery.)
8. Mary Bronen & Mary Beth O'Keefe, Nativity Grade School class of '68 (tie)
9. Eva Longoria
10. Cashier at Amoco on Randolph & Edgecumbe
9:03 AM
Oops. Forgot Halle Berry. Replacing Kate Beckinsdale at #2.
Sorry Kate.
9:20 AM
Oops. Forgot Eva Green, from the lastest James Bond movie, Casino Royale. Replacing Michelle Pfeiffer at #3.
Sorry Michelle.
12:54 PM
Task Force Needed to Investigate Blog Bias?
After a full week in which four people posted lists of the 10 Sexiest Women Not Steve's Wife, a troubling pattern has emerged. Not one Jessica or Jennifer appears on any list. This in spite of the fact that the following Hollywood hotties often appear on such lists, and often near the top:
Jessica Alba
Jessica Simpson
Jessica Biel
Jennifer Anniston
Jennifer Connelly
Jenny McCarthy
We can only speculate on the reasons for this anomaly, but clearly an investigation is warranted.
If readers of the St. John's Hoops Blog would contribute to defray the costs, I would volunteer--on my own time--to fly out to Hollywood and personally discuss the situation with the three Jessicas and three Jennifers. I would be willing to spend as much time as necessary to help them overcome this snub. ("Jen, even though Brad left you for that holier-than-thou floozy Angelina Jolie, I still think you're cute. And who does that Brad Pitt think he is, anyway? You take away all that money and fame and talent and good looks and what have you got? ME, that's what!")
Please send your contributions for this important work to the "Jes and Jen--We Still Love You Fund," care of St. John's Hoops. Thank you.
11:44 AM
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