Who’s in charge here?

Posted by Paul A. Bard

President Merkin Muffley: General Turgidson, I find this very difficult to understand. I was under the impression that I was the only one in authority to order the use of nuclear weapons.

General Buck Turgidson: That's right, sir, you are the only person authorized to do so. And although I, uh, hate to judge before all the facts are in, it's beginning to look like, uh, General Ripper exceeded his authority.

Eerie echoes coming through the airwaves last weekend. First on “Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me,” Peter Sagal recounted this story: In those early days of the Bush presidency, according to a new book by Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist Ron Suskind, George W. Bush would get very upset during cabinet meetings when participants directed comments to Vice President Dick Cheney instead of to him. Bush talked to Cheney about it and Cheney agreed to keep a respectful silence, for the most part, from then on.

Then, last weekend, as the Olympics were getting underway in Beijing, TV coverage showed President Bush at several events, cheering on the U.S. Meanwhile, the Russian army was attacking Georgia, and though President Bush did comment the stronger words, arguably, came from Cheney, who said “Russian aggression must not go unanswered.” When asked to expand on that comment, a White House spokesman said that Cheney’s comment meant “it must not stand.”

“This will not stand,” of course, is what the elder President Bush famously said about Saddam Hussein’s invasion of Kuwait, just before Gulf War I, at which time . . . Dick Cheney was Secretary of Defense.

The juxtaposition of these anecdotes might have you asking “who the heck is in charge here?” But the more urgent question is, as always, will you be there for basketball tomorrow? Tip-off is at 8:00 a.m., as usual. Please let Steve know, etc.